Annual Happiness Tips 2015... Not New Years Resolutions!

Hi all, Happy New Year!

I've been doing some decorating on my fashion blog and so I wanted to launch the new year with a simultaneous post on both blogs at the same time, especially as this post bridges both topics well.

I haven't forgotten this blog however, but with this being my more personal musings I have been posting on here less often in the past year as it has been quite an emotional ride. I will be more active on here this year as I have a better hold of myself now than I did before.

Anyway to the root of this post which is about my Annual Happiness Tips 2015.

My big problem, and I think most people's problem, with New Years Resolutions (NYRS from now on in this post) is that everyone tries to make them, but tends to break them within the year, some don't even see out January.

Resolution in the Oxford English Dictionary is "A firm decision to do or not to do something", so by making and then breaking a resolution, you nullify the term in its entirety. Most people seem to make NYRS that are frankly untenable in their daily lives and then curse the tradition when they break/fail to meet their decisions made on January 1st. I always find myself saying I will never eat chocolate again, then diving into the leftover box of Celebrations; or that I will blog three times a week and then you don't hear from me for months. It is as if the tradition has become a joke in modern day life, so enter my Annual Happiness Tips.

Annual Happiness Tips are my version of NYRS as they are simple suggestions that I want to make every year to make myself happier, but and most importantly of all, they are only tips, they can be ignored, broken, interpreted etc. anyway I like. So no more pressure, hassle or guilt, basically my idea of perfection.

This year I have made four tips to enhance my life in 2015 and I have written these in my journal and will share them with you all now:

1. Be healthy but don't make myself crazy with worrying or feeling guilty when I am simply enjoying my life!
2. Be happy for what I have in life and remember that everyday (but at the same time it is ok to be sad every now and again - just not more often than I am happy). 
3. Be more creative more often; blog, do more photography, spend more time colouring and do more Lego building! 
4. Do something amazing every month; from seeing friends to travelling or just having an excellent experience at home with my family. 

If you hate making NYRS like I do, I hope that Annual Happiness Tips will make life better and take the pressure off at this time of the year,

Happy 2015 everyone, I hope you had a lovely festive season and are looking forward to a brilliant new year!

Lots of luv,

Amber xx♥

The Constant Balancing Act...

Hey all,

I've discussed on this blog before my belief in the universal constant balancing act; some call it ying and yang. (I think me being a child of hippies maybe sinking in lol!) But I didn't really understand its power until recently.

I thought that big chunks of bad are balanced by an equal amount of good, but then I realised that everything has its own opposite. What may seem to be really bad at the time, may produce the best times of your life. There are many clichés which many of us are too quick to dismiss, but they are so true! Seriously, my recent job rejection has turned into the opportunity for me to spend more time on things that I am passionate about. It's that one door closes one... I have laughed at that in the moments of despair, but I don't think I am going to do that anymore.

From now on I want to focus on the positives. It is so much easier to look at the negatives when you feel rejected or dejected, but it is just not healthy. It is so much better to start looking for the good in the opportunities life brings you.

A side note, the universal balancing act is sometimes very much like the old metallic scales in my experience. It is not; a bad things has happened BAM good thing, it can be though! However, sometimes you get a build up of credit before the universe gives you back what you are owed. It can take years. It helps if you treat life with kindness and care, I think karma gives you the goodness back for that too.

I hope this post is helpful to you guys who are finding yourself in a period of bad times, please remember to look for the good as trust me it is in there. You will find it in your friends and family if nothing else, and I am always here too!

As always lots of luv,
Amber xx♥

Don't let life defeat you...

When it is all getting too tough,

When it tries to break you up,

Stand tall and be proud,

Aim your dreams higher than the clouds. 

They can't stop you,

If you stay strong,

You have to persevere,

You will still do stuff wrong. 

It's not something that should cause your demise,

You can weather any tide,

It may just take some time,

But you will walk in the sunshine.

Hope you are well guys, I'm here if you need me.

Luv,

Amber xx♥️

Music is a wonderful thing...

Hi all,

So a few days ago I was busting out a bit of Whitney Houston whilst making my parents a frankly delicious dinner, and I realised I have a really weird music taste, so I thought I would write a bit about it in this blog. Disclaimer - this is the highlights, I cannot write about it all unless I was writing a novel, I may do a part two at some point.

My music taste cannot be put into a category, I love a wide range of music and yet there is still some things that really piss me off (including but not exclusive to club music where they play the first line of an epic song - then drop the bass and stop the lyrics - angry amber lol).

Lets begin with the ladies: Taylor Swift seems to write my romantic life in song, I am really hoping it picks up as some of the songs are too realistic to my life its surreal. Whitney listening to her today was awesome, her range is just wow and the fact she sounds just as great in a remix as she does on the base track is frankly amazing - check out a remix of I Will Always Love You if you are a fan. Britney Spears you are a goddess, although I haven't loved her music as much of late and her early stuff will always be my favourite...Hit Me Baby One More Time <3. Gaga, the Queen, The Fame Monster, BTW, Artpop, need I go on, her voice is incredible and man can she write a catchy dance track just as epic as a ballad. I need to stop this at some point but I couldn't leave out Amy Winehouse as I have never listened to a more incredible album than Back to Black, I don't think anyone will ever be able to match her raw emotion and unbelievable talent, I am always sad that the world will not hear another album from her, she is sorely missed.

From ladies to lads I guess: I will start with the legend that is Jeff Buckley, man thank you for recording the hauntingly beautiful Hallelujah and the perfect The Last Goodbye, two songs that will never leave me. Bruno Mars, not only are you the best to see live, but all of your albums are fab, and please keep writing catchy songs because things like Natalie and Treasure are what make me smile. John Legend, All of Me is one of my favourite songs ever, enough said. Bryan Adams, Summer of '69 is a feel-good tune that even though I wasn't born then makes me wish I was :) also When You're Gone is one of the coolest songs ever written and I am glad you got sporty spice to sing on it. Ed Sheeran, + & x = some of the best pop songs ever written, Thinking Out Loud is also an incredibly moving song which I hugely love. Enrique, sing Hero to me in Spanish anytime... need I say more? Finally Justin Timberlake, have you ever written a bad song? I cannot pick an album I love the most out of Senorita and What Goes Around/Comes Around - they are both musically genius.

Bands wise there is a huuuge list, Maroon 5 and The Script are both beyond epic, I need their new albums in my life. The Black Crowes are by far the most chilled rock band I have ever seen play (carpet anyone? lol) Lawson, I love your first album, please can I have a new one soon and not your old one repackaged. I love Backstreet Boys, Five and N'SYNC, yes I have an appreciation for 90's boy bands - sorry, not sorry. The Killers, Mr. Brightside = best rock out song ever written. The Goo Goo Dolls, Iris is one of those songs music will forever be grateful for. Nickelback, I still love you, you remind me of a lot (sorry for the pun). The Darkness and the Jonas Brothers, thank you for being my first two concerts (in that order)  and finally to The Stereophonics, well when a guy sung Dakota on holiday I was the happiest girl alive, it's the perfect summer tune. 

Wow that was a lot,

I hope you all see why I said it was a long list, that's not even all of it,

Anyway speak soon,
Lots of love,
Amber xx♥

A good way to argue...

Hey guys,

Throughout my life, like many of yours I am sure, I have been faced with confrontation and dealt with it in a variety of terrible ways. But more recently, aided I think by my desire to be a barrister, I crafted my very own art of arguing, which to this day, works. 

A disclaimer before I start; confrontation comes in many forms. Sometimes someone will confront you with hurtful words and it will cause anger and tears, for moments that really break your heart, this method didn't even work for me. However in moments of arguement, when someone is just down right out of line; this method is kind of perfect. 

So basically people who are down-right wrong and lying, know full well they are, and they'll love to try to convince you they're not. But be firm and stick your ground, don't let anyone bully they're ideas past you just because they rock the foundations. 

Next, don't show anger. They'll love to know they got under your skin and will manipulate the situation from then. My best friend summed this up the best; "Lower your voice, strengthen your argument". Not only will it irritate the other person that you are not biting the carrot they are dangling in front of you but also it allows you to remain calm and focused, while they rage on. 

If all else fails, let them rant and don't say a single word. Eventually they'll realise that you haven't been talking and aren't fighting back and think they've won. Hopefully that will allow a momentary silence for you to step in. At this point you can let them know you've heard all the rediculous s*#% they managed to string together AND now it's your turn. 

Hopefully if you haven't tuned completely out of their rant, you will of picked up a few key points that you can calmly retort (sorry debating changes you), and with a few quick quips their argument is destroyed and they have to eat their words. 

Now like the disclaimer I said above, sometimes this may not be 100% effective, but I find it keeps me calmer in situations usually driven out of control. The key here is to stay calm, keep your tone firm and be unwavering but not unopen to the idea the whole thing may end without resolution. 

I hope this can help you guys in the future, 

[UPDATE] should be posting more regularly but I want to write based on how I feel and about subjects that feel right to me, so I can't promise a particular schedule. 

Luv,

Amber xx♥️

"There is a line between your past and your future"

That line was from Rachael Berry in Glee. But how true is that? The line is not necessarily physical, although some decide to change their appearance and cast aside one persona to become another - take Norma Jeane and Marilyn Monroe for a prime example - some however are more subtle lines, the last exchange of words, the change in lifestyle or the moment when you decide that you are no longer going to feel that way and that you deserve to let the new in.

I have been trying to draw my own lines, from the me that was bullied; from the me that was broken hearted on more than one occasion and from the me that was well younger than I am now. But the thing about lines are that once you cross them, there is no going back. And I don't really think you should live like that. 

This doesn't mean that you should live your life eternally stuck in a place that is frankly self destructive, but I think sometimes you need to own who you are and realise that something good will always come from anything bad, you just need to learn from it. 

I'm currently learning a lot more than I did about Marilyn - I kind of think she's becoming one of my idols - but she apparently once said, "Good things fall apart, so better things can fall together" and I think she was right. So perhaps a better way than drawing lines is to think of yourself remodelled, Amber 3.0 if you like, as after it all you aren't broken, you are just a different shape than before. 

So if you were once part of a pair, or been a bit dented along the way, remember that although you feel broken you aren't, you are just a bit different now. But most importantly you've taken on what happened and you own it, you aren't holding your own pity party and you're believing that you are more fabulous than before! 

But if you are out there feeling low, talk to someone; really anyone you trust. You have to remember you are not alone and I didn't realise until I looked on the internet how un-alone I was, there is (unfortunately) always someone who sympathises and the adivce they get given may help you too, you never know until you look. 

As always I hope you all are well, but if you want some advice comment below and I will do my best to help, 

Luv,

Amber xx♥️

2 Days Till Aduthood; A Post Series - Post Four: Quotes

Hey again,

I have a whiteboard at the end of my bed which hasn't been white for a while, because it contains my favourite quotes. I have also been collecting some on my Goodreads page where it is really easy to collect them and store them in a list. N.B. None of these are lyrics, I feel I should do a separate post for them.

Some of these are so inspirational, and are able to lift me from a bad mood, or brighten a sunny day.

I am going to post my top ten below, but in truth I have more than that and this could go on for ages, (if you want to see more search for me on Goodreads - Ambsg) so here is my top ten:

1. "I don't care what you think about me, I don't think about you at all." - Coco Chanel
2. "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
3. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - Bernard M. Baruch
4. "You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching, Love like you'll never be hurt, Sing like there's nobody listening, And live like it's heaven on Earth." - William W. Purkey
5. "I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night." - Sarah Williams
6. "Be the change that you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi
7. "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
8. "Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: "What! You too? I thought that no one but myself..." - C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
9. "Creativity is intelligence having fun." - Albert Einstein
10. "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough" - Mae West

Anyway I hope you enjoyed these,

All the best,
Luv,
Amber xx♥