5 Days Till Adulthood; A Post Series - Post One: Support

Hey all,

I am 5 days away from 18. Wow.  That is such a crazy thing to write down. I want to make this a post series in which I will write a post every day until midnight on the day I turn 18.

What can I say as a nearly adult. This past year I have grown more than I have in a long time, I am learning more about who I am as a person and what I like and don't like. Also I have learnt more about what I am truly passionate about but more to come on that soon.

Something I learnt only recently is that I really dislike being alone, and it is more than the fact I am recently single, I just really hate being by myself. I always knew I was good at making friends, but saying goodbye to friends I don't know when I will see again really made me realise how important they are to me. I also caught up with a friend who went to uni abroad and our chance meeting (Hi Laura!) made me really miss her company that I was so used to having around before she left. My saving grace however is that I am actually very rarely by myself, I always have my baby kitten to cuddle and the best parents I could ask for, which are always there if  I want to have a laugh and hang out - we really are the tightest of family units, friends as well as family. I always have the greatest friends in the world whose praises I can't sing high enough. I always have them at the end of the phone to call or text whenever I need a good laugh or a rant, it is the best thing to know that I am supported like that. I feel very lucky to have that network I know that some don't have.

So although I will soon be an adult, I am not a bird flying from the nest solo, I have the best support network I could ask for, so whatever happens I am not afraid, because, thankfully, I am never alone.

I hope that you all are not feeling alone, please understand if you are then reach out to someone and find some common ground with others. There are nearly 7 billion people on this planet and you will find someone with interests similar to you. If you would like me to write a post on friendships then leave me a comment on any of my social media or in the comments below.

See you all tomorrow,

Lots of Luv,

Amber xx♥

My Life Re-invented

Hello everyone,

So a period of my life has ended, I have done all of my a-level exams and am now free to pursue...what ever I want to really. It is really strange to have all of this free time and my own will is my own controller, its freedom at the highest level. I really am happy now, and it's a feeling I hope will last for a long time.

After a stressful period, probably the most testing six months of my life, I feel somewhat unburdened now. Things that have sort to sadden me are now simple memories which will always have there mark but they are more bruises than open-gaping wounds. I am a more rounded person now, I have learnt many a lesson and am opening a new chapter of my life, where the pages are all blank, waiting to make their own history.

I am also on the brink of becoming an adult, well at least a young one, as I am not far from my eighteenth birthday, which is just another key moment awaiting me, I cannot wait, I am really excited to see what this new year brings for me.

I guess for me my new year starts on my birthday, so although I know 2014 started in January, this new era starts later than that for me.

I am going to be more pro-active on all of my blogs, twitter etc. I also hope to have a YouTube channel soon so I will let you know when that gets going.

For now, it's a book then bed,

Night all, hope you are all ok,

Luv,

Amber xx♥

Everything falls into place.

Hey guys,

It's such a cliched phrase but it's the root of my year review. As you know I am a strong believer in universal balance but only until this year did I realise its true power.

This year has had major highlights, including my very first long haul flight which took me to India. I saw some amazing things and some very saddening things, it's one of those places where you see a bank next to a slum, but hey, that's irony for you. I did enjoy this trip, it was spiritually very eye-opening, you think Britain is multi-faith well in India you have Buddhists, Sikhs, Hindus and Muslims; all very passionate and strong willed, living in harmony and with very little dispute, which is unusual to most multi-faith countries if you believe what you read.

I also experienced my first holiday (well I don't really know what to call it) which showed me that most holiday glimmers fade with nostalgia when you get home. Shame really. I have, despite that, made some really good friends and plans to go back to Tolo when I am older.

I have been working very hard this year which is one of the reasons this blog has been neglected, GCSE's began in June and then the stress rolled in, which has been good to learn to handle, if at worst I feel I can cope better now I have been through it once.

As I mentioned in the last post I also lost my great-grandad this year and he was buried last Friday. I think watching a human die has to be the world's worst thing to experience, definitely made me a stronger person.

I guess that the best thing that has changed me this year is learning not to take anyone's bullshit any more, I have spent to long feeling weak and pathetic and something inside of me just said "Amber, what the hell are you doing?" and I realised that I wasn't going to let it get to me anymore. Now I am not playing the martyr card here and really don't want sympathy, I just now don't have the tolerance to take crap anymore. This year there was a massive argument between two of my closest friends and me and in the end I just realised it wasn't fair and spoke up, I lost one of my friends but now I'm after a drama free life and I deserve it.

So I am stronger, I've cried a bit and I have had one of the biggest years to change me in a long time, I know who my true friends are, who has my heart and trust, I love my parents more than anything in the world and I am starting to sort my head out into a vague idea for the future but as Harry says in the new film:

"Hermione! When have any of our plans ever worked? We plan, we get there, all hell breaks loose!"

Which is so true, the whole world sorts itself out in the end, Wars start, peace comes, Loose your job, get the job of your dreams, Broken heart, finding the person that should of been there all along etc...

The world in balance.

Love you guys,

Amber xx

the Taj Mahal in the distance, the symbol of symmetry and love. 2011